User blog:Goddess of Despair/Season 6 Battle 3 Matilda of Canossa vs Boudica
Matilda of Canossa; the badass guardian of the Pope who defeated German king Henry IV! Boudica; the Celtic warrior who slaughtered Roman forces for revenge! Who is deadliest? To find out, our wikians are testing history's most lethal weapons. No rules, no safety, no mercy. History will be re-written in this duel to the death to decide who is the deadliest warrior! Matilda of Canossa History= Matilda of Canossa gets her epithet from the name of her family fortress. It's rare for a person to be named after a castle, but if anybody in Medieval Europe is worthy of that distinction, it's probably Matilda. For 60 years, this hardcore warrior woman kicked asses in Northern Italy, providing the main military defense force for none other than the Roman Popes, single-handedly taking on any challenges to the Papacy. She's now one of the few women from the Middle Ages known for her prowess in combat, and her role as the Pope's personal badass isn't the sort of honor that got handed out to any douchebag with a castle. She was tough, nobody fucked with her, and – more importantly – as long as she was around nobody fucked with the Pope without thinking twice about it first. Taken from badass of the week |-| Short range= Broadsword *Length-59 inches. *Weight-3 pounds. *Steel. |-| Medium range= Lance *Length-13.1 feet. *Steel. |-| Long range= Crossbow *Range-984.2 feet. *Ammo-Bolt. *Steel and Wood Boudica History= The story of how the fiery slaughter and wanton ruination of the city of London became so fondly remembered begins in the year 61 AD, when some painfully-uninteresting ruler of the Iceni tribe of northern Britannia had the audacity to die of old age and leave behind the most tragically-misunderstood will in the history of last wills and testaments. Without getting too much into the mind-numbing world of common law litigation, when this old codger kicked it, he left behind a poorly-spelled hand-written note in crayon and food coloring that granted control of his tribe to his wife (and co-ruler) – an iron-spined, well-respected Celtic warrior known as Boudicca – but that also made the Roman Emperor a co-ruler of the land as well. Because the Iceni were a client-state of Rome, he figured he didn't really have much say in the matter in the first place, but with this terrible will he unwittingly gave Rome more power than it already had over his people, and probably gave his attorney an aneurysm in the process. Taken from Badass of the Weak |-| Short range= Celtic Longsword *Length-36 inches. *Weight-5 pounds. *Steel. |-| Medium range= Lancea *Length-8.5 feet. *Wood shaft and iron head. |-| Long range= Sling *Considered by many to be the most powerful weapon ever created. *Range-660 feet. *Ammo-stone. *Braided Cord and leather. Voting/Battle Information The battle will be a 4 on 4 and will take place in a small forest. Neither warrior is familliar with the area. Edges or a 2 paragraphs are required to count as a full vote. Votes with one word, sentence, or state no arguments will not count. Proper grammar is required. Voting ends Spetember 9th, 2013 Battle The sunlight shines upon Matilda of Canossa and her 4 knights as they march on the road to Rome. Next to Matilda, mounted on a horse, was Gregory VII, the pope. Matilda was mounted on her own horse, wielding a War Lance. Located on the side of the road was a forest, where Boudica and her Celtic warriors await the passing of enemy troops. Matilda, sensing something wrong, ordered a halt to her troops. She turned, scanning the horizon. Suddenly, a stone came flying at one of her troops! It hit the man right in his head, smashing his nose and making him scream in agony. From the forest, Boudica and her four Celts charged. She turned to one Knight, ordering him to follow and defend the pope. She then turned to another, her crossbowman, and ordered him to take aim. A Lancea suddenly came flying towards them, meeting its mark on the already wounded Knight. Matilda’s crossbowman fired a bolt, which brought down one Celtic warrior. With a roar, Matilda rode off towards the Celts, as her two Knights followed, one forced to discard his crossbow for a sword. Matilda striked a Celtic warrior in the throat, blood splattering from the wound. Boudica, armed with a Lancea, impaled a Knight before he could react with his sword. The second Knight slashed high with his broadsword, but the Celt parried and kicked him in the chest. Stumbling back, the Knight made a wild slash at the Celt, missing him. Another Celt came up from his side, whom he thrusted into with his sword. However that was plenty of time for the other Celtic warrior to catch up behind him and decapitate him. Matilda of Canossa rode towards the Celtic warrior and swung her sword, slicing his throat. Boudica, with a roar, charged at the mounted warrior and hurled her Lancea! The weapon impaled itself upon Matilda’s horse, which made the beast collapse and throw Matilda onto the ground. Boudica drew her sword and charged again, as Matilda struggled to stand. Matilda parried a high slash from Boudica, and then slashed back, ruining her wooden shield. Boudica dropped it and angrily thrusted at her. Thankfully, her armor deflected the blow and left Boudica wide open. Matilda thrusted her Broadsword into the Celt’s stomach. Matilda tore out her sword as Boudica crumbled to the ground. The Knight and pope returned to her side and, after burying the dead, they set off once again for Rome. Simulator's Results Expert's Opinion Boudica is a fierce fighter, but she was no match for Matilda's superior armor and experience. In addition, Matilda possessed better weapons for long and short range. 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